Filmmaker Ram Gopal Varma has shared a deeply personal tribute to Michael Jackson after watching the biography film Michael, saying he 'hated' the film because it forced him to relive the shock of the King of Pop's death on 25 June 2009. The post, which blends raw grief with lifelong admiration, has drawn wide attention for its candour and emotional intensity.

The Moment Jackson Died

Varma described waking up to the news on television with disbelief. 'I HATE MICHAEL. After watching MICHAEL film, my memory went back to that horrible day June 25th, 2009 when I slept late with the television still murmuring like a ghost in the darkness of my room, and as I groggily woke up in the morning and my eyes went to the screen to see those terrible white letters against black: 'Michael Jackson is Dead',' he wrote.

He recalled frantically switching channels, only to find every anchor delivering the same solemn verdict. 'I finally realised the impossible had happened,' he said.

The Vijayawada Video Parlour That Changed Everything

Varma traced his Jackson obsession to 1984, when a friend pulled him into a video parlour in Vijayawada during his engineering college days. The film playing was Thriller.

'The lights got switched off, and then THRILLER hit me like a punch in the gut. It was not just a song or a dance. It was an invasion. My eyes, conditioned by a lifetime of mediocrity were violently pried open,' Varma wrote. He described Jackson as a 'supernatural entity' who 'didn't move like a human being — he glided, he exploded, he floated.'

He added that he walked out of the parlour in a 'complete daze,' convinced Jackson could not be a real person.

Jackson as a Cinematic Benchmark

Varma said Jackson's music videos — from Beat It and Billie Jean to Smooth Criminal, Black or White, and Remember the Time — became an enduring reference point throughout his filmmaking career. 'Each one was a brand New Testament and in every song picturisation discussion I've had in my career whether with my team or other directors, we always circled back to his videos,' he wrote.

He called Jackson's body of work 'an unreachable benchmark, a constant source of both inspiration and humility.'

On the Scandals — and Why They Didn't Matter to Him

Varma was direct about Jackson's controversies, saying they were 'background noise' to him. 'What he gave my senses and my soul far outweighed anything a human court or a tabloid magazine could ever throw at him,' he wrote, adding that to him Jackson was 'either God or God's special creation.'

Why He 'Hates' — and Loves — Michael Jackson

The filmmaker explained his use of the word 'hate' as an expression of grief at mortality. 'I hate him for proving that even he was human. I hate that he too needed oxygen and blood like the rest of us. I hate that his heart could stop beating too,' Varma wrote.

He ended on a note of undying affection: 'I love you more than I can express in words. Wherever you are now, in whatever dimension, I am sure you are moonwalking across galaxies, creating space storms, with a brilliance which even the stars cannot contain. And I will carry that daze you gave me in that Vijayawada video parlour till i die.'

The tribute underscores Jackson's lasting imprint on Indian popular culture and creative sensibilities, more than 15 years after his passing.