New Delhi, Sep 24 (NationPress) England fast bowler Kate Cross has expressed her ongoing struggle to accept the loss of her central contract, labeling it the “most challenging week” of her professional journey. The 33-year-old, who has achieved over 100 wickets across all formats since her debut in 2013, was informed just before the Women’s Hundred that her contract would not be extended for 2025.

“This has definitely been one of the hardest weeks in my career,” Cross shared on the No Balls Podcast. “During my appraisal with Lott (head coach Charlotte Edwards) and Finchy [director of women’s cricket Jonathan Finch], they revealed that I wouldn’t be receiving a renewal for my England contract for the upcoming year.

“Starting from October 2025, I will not represent England as a professional cricketer. It’s a statement I've dreaded making. I feel nauseous. It remains very fresh in my mind [...] and now I must participate in what is usually the most enjoyable tournament of the year, while anticipating a difficult few weeks ahead,” she remarked.

Cross's journey took a downturn when she was dropped midway through England’s ODI series against India this summer and subsequently missed selection for the upcoming ODI World Cup, a decision she described as “harsh.”

“I began the India series as the opening bowler for England in the vice-captain role, only to find myself out of the 13 for the last ODI match,” she explained. “Lottie [Edwards] mentioned in our talk prior to the game that it was a must-win situation, and I was not included in the 13. As a player who has consistently prided herself on being a dependable bowler for my captain in critical moments, it was hard to digest. It felt as though trust had been lost swiftly. I’m not naïve; I understand that something has shifted that could jeopardize my future,” she added.

The bowler, who played a significant role in leading Northern Superchargers to victory in The Hundred this season and helped Lancashire achieve wins in both the Women’s County Cup and One-Day Cup, acknowledged that off-field disappointments had cast a shadow over her summer.

“While I had a fantastic summer with Northern Superchargers, the last few weeks have been incredibly difficult. I’ve found it hard to enjoy cricket and may have been the least supportive teammate for my Lancs colleagues. We’ve endured several lengthy bus rides where I’ve isolated myself, feeling somewhat mute and numb,” she explained.

“I’m still unsure about how I feel,” Cross continued. “I haven’t fully processed it. Upon returning to the Lancashire structure after The Hundred, it became clear how distracted I had been. I had planned to get through The Hundred, finish the Lancs season, and then... I’m uncertain. I’m seeing a professional this afternoon to begin the journey of processing this,” she said.

Having played eight Tests, 76 ODIs, and 18 T20Is for England, Cross revealed that the most painful aspect was how swiftly her international career seemed to unravel.

“There’s a sense of finality that lingers, and what upset me most during our conversation a month ago was how rapidly everything transpired. That’s the part I haven’t yet come to terms with,” she concluded.